So the holiday season was upon us, as was the tremendous shopping that we all feel like we have to do. Oh I know, we all say that we aren’t doing a lot this year; trying to cut back, get to the “real” meaning of Christmas. All the while, we talk about what “Santa” is getting the kids for Christmas. Not too much of course. Santa must be in on the true meaning as well. Don’t get me wrong, I am not a Santa hater. Love the story, love the big guy, who isn’t real just the same as I have a fondness for Elmo or any of those characters. I just happen to think if I am going to plunk down a load of cash on gifts, I want my kids to know it’s me doing the plunking. I mean think about it, Christmas morning “Santa” brings your kids an IPOD, and all you got them was a lousy game boy. I’m just saying, these things set kids up for later in life thinking their parents are cheap or just poor. Not to mention for our family having to explain that he isn’t real to a very literal boy, and then saying “but God is real, that we didn’t lie to you about.” But I digress.
We hope and pray to find the Wii set up, or the motorized scooter, or the ever popular, sell your soul for… IPOD nano. My circle of friends by the way is mostly parents of the 8 and under crowd. So we press on to the holiday spirit and the giving of it all. Certainly not the getting! No, no. I have heard it said, even from my own lips, “Christmas is so fun with kids!” The wonder of it all. As I went on one of my pilgramages of shopping, you know, for just the few things we were getting, those words were swirling around my head like the proverbial suger plums. It occured to me that Christmas was about Christ. I know funny thing to have just occur to someone, but really. We always get our kids the three gifts of the wise men. Practical, spiritual and extravegant. Simple enough. Still there is stress. Will they like what we have chosen? Will the extravegant be grand enough? Will the spiritual convey Christ fully? Will they roll their little eyes at the practical? So we search each year for the perfect thing, as I was doing upon my revelation. I was in Wal-Mart in a HUGE line at 8:30 at night, just picking up a few last minute things. I saw faces of the customers frustrated by the lines and the lack of merchandise so close to Christmas. It’s all about Christ, and yet here I am trying to get those last few things. Why? I should be home reading the story of Christ to my children. Truth be told, some nights I go shopping alone with my Starbucks so I can like my children even more. But on this night, I thought ‘this is silly.’ I wanted to get on the loud speaker and say” Attention shoppers!!! Your kids won’t care if you get them any of that stuff!! Go home! Spend time with them! Get a fun family game and play it!” As you can imagine, I didn’t do that. It’s not that I think Wal-Mart is all that great, I just hate the thought of being banned from any store. Maybe I could just whisper it to the person next to me. No, too weird. The weird part being that I would be chatting with a stranger, something I am often accused of doing and this night seemed all too inappropriate. So I stood in line, silently, thinking about all the “perfect” gifts I had already purchased. Oh dear! I had forgotten the spiritual gifts! Of all the things. I had been so busy trying to think of the other things and baking and mailing and all that, that I completely missed it. By 9:00pm I was at the Christian bookstore, searching for just the right gift of a spiritual nature. Something that shows my kids, ” see guys this is what Christmas is all about”. What am I, Linus? Linus has it all over me this year I’m afraid. By 9:45pm I had found it. A sweet Bible for my girl, a fun devotional for the big boy and a cute little first bible for the baby. Perfect. Still, the thoughts kept coming back, sticking with the true meaning. After awhile I had brushed those thoughts aside and had a more lofty thought. Tomorrow I would be diligent and read the Bible more to the kids, and we’d have hot cocoa and listen to Christmas songs together. We’d play games, and draw. Just let me get my things done I need to for Christmas. After all, it was coming pretty fast this year. It was on the 25th you know. Is it the same day every year?
As I left the store, I realized I needed to find a bathroom. I am 7 months pregnant and so, well, nature calls way more than I have time for. Alas, I head to Target, because it’s close and oh, I forgot to pick up those few school lunch items. Off we go! I headed into the bathroom and was immediatley grateful I am past all the nausea of the first trimester. The bathroom would make a sailor sick. Almost every toilet had a keeper. Ask any foreman and they’ll tell you what a keeper is, but I’d rather let you imagine at this point. I finally find one, only to find it has pee spots on the seat. Seriously, I don’t live in the crack neighborhood where someone might be too strung out to realize they have just sprinkled a little blessing on the seat. So I moved on. Finally, I really did find a stall. I went in, did my business, which was growing more urgent by the minute. I looked over for the toilet paper… none. Perfect. What do you do in these situations? I was in a panic. It had been a stressful day after all. I remembered that our family had just been plagued by a nasty cold and so as all good moms should I had a pack of tissues in my purse. A silent prayer that they’d still be and eureka! They are! Saved. As I left the bathroom, hands washed, especially after that scene, I thought again. See, this is why I should be home. At least to be snuggling my husband and chatting. I believe that digusting bathroom was for me. Really. Placed there by God Himself to show me what my life over the past few weeks had been like. My kids have plenty of goodies. My husband and I have an abundance of goodies. I didn’t need to be out shopping. I should have considered myself done shopping. Going into a rat hole of a restroom in North Dallas was just the remedy I needed. I could have been home in my own warm house where I knew the TP was in abundance. I should know, I’m the one who replaces it!
As it turned out, I did start doing a few more Christmasy things with everyone. We did have hot cocoa, and read more, and listen to music, and watched a few of the old movies. But still, I felt as though I had missed it.
A few days later Christmas came with all it’s excitement. Our sweet children, the ones who I was concerned needed the perfect gifts, spent a half hour looking at their new Bibles. They were so thrilled with that they didn’t really think of the other things piled under the tree. When we mentioned they should start opening their other gifts, they opened one at a time, took the time to play with each new item and were so grateful for every one. Three gifts per child is alot in a family of three kiddos. I watched them and realized, somehow they got it. All my time spent away from them buying the perfect thing, they got it. Not because of my purchases, but because God knew my heart. Somehow He shined through my blunders of trying to make it all just so. To me that was the best gift of all. Knowing that God will meet my kids, right where I have made a mess of things.
