Welcome to the house of unreasonable…

“Welcome to the House of Unreasonable, how can I help you?” That’s how I plan on answering my phone for the next 5 years. That’s what most days around here are, terribly unreasonable. Let me clarify. I have an almost 3 year old who is unreasonable. It hit me today that as I try to have a fun day with him or do interesting things he just doesn’t allow that to happen. For instance, I was folding laundry and he wanted to help. ‘Great!’ I think until he starts ‘helping’. I gave him a smallish white towel, and as you may have guessed that wasn’t the one he had in mind. He wanted the huge gray towel. It’s twice his size. He couldn’t even attempt to fold a corner of it. ‘Why not let him try?’ you might be asking yourself. Well here’s how it would go down. “Canon here’s the towel you begged for.” “Momma!!! It’s tooooo biiiiigggg!” Cue whining. “Moooooommmmyyy, I need help!!” Ok, so I try to help. “No I can do it by myself!!”. “Canon you seem to need help.” “Can I do it by myself next time?!” And so that last question will haunt me for the next 3 hours. Really, no lie. Every time he would think of it he’d ask it. Another unreasonable event might be in relation to food. He’s a great eater, just painfully slow. He waits awhile to finish lunch, sometimes not finishing it really. When I go to throw the leftovers out after having asked if he was indeed finished, he screams and pleads with me to have more of whatever it was he was ‘finished’ with. If I concede and give him more, he will stare at it for 20 minutes only to eventually be dragged to bed, extra lunch not touched.

See these are the crazy makers of the day. I am not complaining to be sure, just musing really; thinking out loud about my day and realizing that this is why I haven’t had time to write in the past year. Or why my roots are gray and haggard. Or why I am two years behind on scrapbooks. Realizing all of this I know I have two choices. To go on in my crazy state of mind, constantly frustrated that the things I deem important don’t get done. Or simply enjoy my little unreasonable soul that I am so blessed to live with, kiss him regularly and tell him, “ I know sweetness, you have a very unreasonable mommy.” Today I will choose option B. The best part is, as I kiss him he smiles back and says “ Mommy…. CAN you lay with me NEXT time?” Cue sobs of disbelief that I have left before the appointed time.

My sad story

Here’s my sad story. I have really been trying to make an effort in my playing with the children. You know, being a mom who’s ‘there.’ I was playing with the boys nicely; building and smashing our blocks, ramming cars, the whole thing. I thought I should think of something to do with Eden. It’s a little harder with her because she’s kind of a girl who comes up with games that really don’t make sense. To her they do, but to anyone outside her mind, it’s a mystery. I asked her to pay hairstylist with me and we could do some fun little braids or ponytails. She really didn’t want to and gave me a couple of excuses. She basically was blowing me off for her friend that was over. By the way, this friend has been with us all summer. We watch her everyday, so it’s not like it was a special play date. A few minutes later I heard the friend ask if Eden wanted to play hairstylist, and to my surprise my sweet peach said “Of course!” Crushed I was, rejected by my own child. You see, I go about my day balancing the housework and playtime only to think I come up short on the latter one. So you can imagine the heartbreak when I am actually making a huge effort, only to be dumped.

Well, the boys went on to a new game and I had lunches to make. As I sat with the baby while he ate his lunch, I was feeling like a lump. I was just sitting there. Canon has no use for me while he’s eating. He’s a do-it-yourself kind of kid. I am there to make sure he doesn’t choke. I didn’t want to read because I am funny about having books around food. Grease, crumbs, and who knows what might jump onto the pages. I thought, Scrabble! I love Scrabble! My mother in law plays by herself all the time on the computer. As I was setting up the game it occurred to me the she plays against the computer, not really by herself. At least there is a challenge in that. Oh well, I still played. I was feeling pretty good about my words. After all, you can come up with some good ones if you’re the only one making the words. A while later the kids meandered down and asked what on earth I was doing. As I started to feel silly, I thought, no, I am showing them that I too know how to play by myself and by the way it’s fun! Once they saw that it was fun, they asked if they could play. I have to admit, I was reluctant to let them. I was having fun. Of course we could play together. Silly me! Well, after lunch everyone lost interest and thought it was more fun to throw fake food over the banister. Actually, I’d have to agree with them. A fake food fight is a hoot. In any case, lesson learned here… same one I learned in Kindergarten, if they don’t want to play with you, move on and find someone who does. It may just be you, and that’s okay.